Date: 08/24/2013 1:09 PM Title: Chapter 1
I don't usually envision McSpirk, but I do love a well-written McCoy and you did such a great job with that. You are really good at putting in small concrete descriptive details that make the reader feel that they are right there in the same space, breathing the same air and seeing, hearing, tasting, smelling everything your character does. I also really loved how the epilogue gave us the vision of a contented Leonard enivisioning a brighter future. Thank you so much for sharing this story!
And thank you so much for following! I connect with McCoy on so many levels, so your words mean a lot to me. I also wanted to give McCoy hope and the reassurance that he didn't need to hide anymore. I tried to be as vivid as I possibly could so I'm actually glad to hear that you've experienced what they've experienced.
Again, thank you so much for reading!
Date: 08/06/2013 10:43 PM Title: Chapter 1
I really like the detail you added, and I noticed a few other changes in the dialogue that make the interactions and progression of the chapter much more fluid and believable. The other version was well written, but I like this. I can hear *your* McCoy in there, and you do him so well. You've also really improved your Spock. I'm always so impressed everytime you upload a new chapter, which just how improved your story telling gets with each part, and you interpretation and presentation of the characters.
Also, that sex scene was smoking!! Girl, you're lighting it up around here *fans collar*
Great job, CD. :) <3
*Blushes* Thank you. Your words mean a lot to me. I feel more comfortable with this version because it's how I saw it in my mind. How they interact with one another I wanted to make it as realistic as possible and I'm glad I was able to capture that. And I'm glad you enjoyed the sex scene, which most definitely means a lot.
Date: 06/29/2013 9:11 AM Title: Chapter 2
Wow...what an awesome second chapter. You have that gift that I love in a author. It is the ability to describe what the character is feeling, and using comparisons. I simply have a hard time with that, but you certainly don't, which makes it a pleasure to read. My God...you have Bones's voice perfectly, as well as the others.
It is a big shock to McCoy, what his two friends sprung on him...I do wonder what he will decide.
Shall read more, when time prevails.
Date: 04/16/2013 2:30 PM Title: Chapter 1
Meeka, your writing is really coming along now. Word choice, phrasing, characterization have all significantly improved and over such a small amount of time. You're playing fabulously to the slow realization on McCoy's part that he may actually be interested--that tiny snippet about the smell of Jim's aftershave was a nice subtle hint, not over or under played. Also, Bones' reaction and Jim and Spock subsequent reaction isn't over done, isn't over dramatized. You've kept the angst at adult levels and withing the professional parameters of their different positions. You're doing an outstanding job of setting it up. I do, however, agree with Pintospirk, that you should change the rating to NC17, to allude to future smexiness. :)
Thank you so much for your kind words. I only improved because I have an awesome Creative Writing professor *smiles at Pamdizzle* Eveything you did helped and continues to help. As far as the rating, I changed it to NC17 just now. Thanks again for the heads up.