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Date: Sun, 13 Feb 2000 11:05:47 -0800

From: Greywolf the Wanderer

Subject: Getting to Know You -- Ee-Chiya the Sehlat...

I bribed my Wolf-dog, Wiley, with a handful of steak, and he agreed to go and interview Ee-Chiya. The only hard part was gettin' access to the Guardian so I could send him back in time. But these are the sacrifices we make for our art...

NAME: Ee-Chiya the Sehlat, current guardian of the young of the House of Surak.

SEX: Male.

HOME: House of Surak, ShiKahr Prefecture, Vulcan.

HEIGHT: Tall enough to Protect my Boy.

EYES: Black

HAIR: My fur is olive-brown.

WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE TV SHOW? I do not watch Tri-Vee. I prefer to go for walks with my Boy; when the Big People cannot see us he is much more fun to play with.

WHAT'S ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? What is a 'mouse pad'? Is it good to eat?

FAVOURITE MAGAZINE: I cannot read. But my Boy is fond of Tales of StarFleet. He found a copy on the street once and smuggled it home. I sit with him in the garden and he reads it almost every day. Then he hides it in my bed.

FAVOURITE SMELL: The scent of my Boy when he is happy and has forgotten what troubles him.

WORST FEELING IN THE WORLD: Seeing my Boy come home from school and knowing that he has been tormented again. If I could get out of the yard I would hit those people with my claws and make them stop.

BEST FEELING IN THE WORLD: Sitting in the garden with my Boy scratching my ears and putting his arms around me. (gravelly deep sound: sehlat purring)

THINGS TO DO ON THE WEEKENDS: Sometimes my Boy and I will go out into the desert for a day or two. The Big People get angry when he does this but they are silly. I know he is safe because I would kill anything that tried to harm him. I am fierce and strong and I Protect!

FAVOURITE SOUNDTRACK: What is a soundtrack? Is it good to eat?

WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU THOUGHT OF WHEN YOU WOKE UP THIS MORNING? Good, the sun is up; soon my Boy will come out and greet me.

DO YOU GET MOTION SICKNESS? No.

ROLLER COASTERS DEADLY OR EXCITING? What is a 'roller coaster'? Is it good to eat?

PEN OR PENCIL? My boy uses a stylus but I tried one once and it did not taste good. So, no thank you.

HOW MANY RINGS BEFORE YOU ANSWER THE COMM? I do not touch the comm. It belongs to the Big People.

FAVOURITE FOODS: Bugs. Ripe fruits. And anything my Boy manages to sneak out and give to me.

DO YOU GET ALONG WITH YOUR PARENTS? I did not meet my father, but my mother was very good to me while I was a cub. I wish my Boy's parents were nicer to him. His father is always displeased with him and it makes him sad.

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN CONVICTED OF A CRIME? No. I Protect.

CHOCOLATE OR VANILLA? I do not know these things.

CROUTONS OR BACON BITS? I do not know these things.

DO YOU LIKE TO DRIVE? No. I do not like to ride in the flitter, it upsets my stomach.

DO YOU SLEEP WITH STUFFED ANIMALS? My Boy sleeps with me sometimes. Does that count?

IF YOU COULD HAVE ANY KIND OF PET, WHAT WOULD IT BE? I do not have any pets, but I belong to my Boy.

IF YOU COULD BE ANY TYPE OF ANIMAL WHAT WOULD YOU BE? I am already a sehlat. I do not wish to be anything else, because then I could not Protect my Boy.

THUNDERSTORMS, COOL OR SCARY? We do not have these things.

IF YOU COULD MEET ANYONE DEAD OR ALIVE, WHO WOULD IT BE? I am content to be with my Boy. I do not need anybody else.

FAVOURITE ALCOHOLIC DRINK: I have not tasted this thing.

WHAT IS YOUR ZODIAC SIGN? What is a zodiac sign? Is it good to eat?

EAT THE STEMS OF BROCCOLI? My boy gives them to me because he does not like the taste. *I* like them.

GUYS -- IF A GIRL ASKED FOR THE SHIRT OFF YOUR BACK WOULD YOU GIVE IT TO HER? I do not wear clothes. But they are good for sleeping on. If I did have clothes I would let my Boy use them.

IF YOU COULD HAVE ANY JOB YOU WANTED, WHAT WOULD IT BE? I Protect. It is the best and most honourable job that there is. And I am very good at it.

IF YOU COULD DYE YOUR HAIR ANY COLOUR, WHAT WOULD IT BE? I prefer my fur to remain as it is.

IF YOU COULD HAVE A TATTOO, WHAT AND WHERE WOULD IT BE? What is a tattoo? Is it good to eat?

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN IN LOVE? I Protect. It is sufficient.

DESCRIBE YOUR DREAM WEDDING: What is a wedding? Is it good to eat?

WHAT IS ON YOUR WALLS IN YOUR ROOM? I live outside. So I do not have any walls.

IS THE GLASS HALF EMPTY OR HALF FULL? What glass?

WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE SNAPPLE? What is a snapple? Is it good to eat?

ARE YOU A RIGHTY, LEFTY OR AMBIDEXTROUS? I do not understand.

DO YOU TYPE WITH YOUR FINGERS ON THE RIGHT KEYS? I do not have fingers, I have paws. But my claws are very strong.

IF YOU COULD BE ONE GARDENING TOOL, WHAT WOULD YOU BE? What is a gardening tool? Is it good to eat?

WHAT'S UNDER YOUR BED? Tales of StarFleet. I keep it safe so the Big People will not see it and my Boy can read it whenever he wants to.

WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE NUMBER? I do not understand numbers. But my Boy is very good with them. He will be a wise man some day.

WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST CAR? I do not have a car.

WHAT IS YOUR DREAM CAR? I do not want a car. I Protect. It is sufficient.

FAVOURITE SPORT TO WATCH: What is a sport? Is it good to eat?

SAY ONE NICE THING ABOUT THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU: You Protect your Boy, as I do mine. It is well. I have not met a Wolf-dog before. I am honoured.

OF ALL THE PEOPLE YOU SEND THIS TO, WHO IS LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND TO IT: I will not send it to anyone. I Protect. It is sufficient.

 

Chapter End Notes:

..........yeah, I know, pure silliness.  So what?  Enjoy ;-)>

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