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Author's Chapter Notes:

the appeal of nostalgia
compared to the futurist inside me
divides me between the pain of now
and the relative joy of the past
while he left before
he returned to my side
this time though my mind does not accept
no offers of redemption
the pipes personify my mourning
its all I can do to hold it together
for me, for the crew, for him
the profound absence of his warmth
in my mind, in our bed
I will yearn forever for his presence
always looking back to what we were

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